Planning a Religious or Traditional Wedding Ceremony
Bride and groom getting married in a church wedding.
“Dearly beloved, we are gathered here today to join this couple in holy matrimony.”
If you’re looking forward to hearing these words, find out how you can plan a traditional wedding ceremony. If you’re a member of a congregation, you can get married at your place of worship. If not, you can plan a traditional ceremony with a non denominational minister or officiant.
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Choosing a Religious Ceremony Venue
If you’re hoping to get married at a place of worship, start by talking to your minister, priest, rabbi or officiant. Some religious officiants will only marry couples who are active members of their congregation.
Most religious officiants will also require you to complete pre-marriage counseling or courses. As well, some might refuse to marry interfaith couples, same sex couples, couples who live together or who have children together.
Find out the regulations at your place of worship before you begin planning your ceremony.
Non Denominational Ministers
If you’d like to get married at a place of worship, but aren’t part of a regular congregation, look for a non denominational minister. They can offer you a religious or spiritual wedding ceremony at any venue you choose.
Depending on where you live, you might be able to find a wedding chapel. A wedding chapel will be set up with an altar area and pews, for a traditional wedding look. Most chapels will have a non denominational officiant, who can help you design a ceremony that suits you.
How Long Does a Wedding Ceremony Last?
The length of the ceremony depends on your officiant and the type of ceremony you plan. Most ceremonies will last between a half hour and forty five minutes. If you’re planning a Catholic wedding with a full mass, it can last an hour or more.
Traditional Wedding Ceremony Order
The exact details and order of events will be a bit different, depending on your religion and your officiant. In general, most traditional wedding ceremonies will have a procession, some comments or readings, plus the vow exchange and the ring exchange.
The Wedding Processional
The ceremony begins with a traditional wedding processional. The couple’s family members, the bridal party and the bride will walk down the aisle.
Introducing the Couple
The officiant will start with welcoming the guests and introducing the couple. If you’re having a traditional ceremony, they’ll probably start with the well known words: “dearly beloved, we are gathered here today to join ths couple in holy matrimony.”
Readings
Most ceremonies include one or two readings that reflect the brides and grooms values, ideals and goals as a married couple. Some readings might be from poetry or classical literature. At a house of worship, most readings will be taken from a religious text.
Declaration of Intent
The declaration of intent is an important part of the legal requirements for marriage. Both partners must declare their intention to become the spouse of the other person. They must state that they are entering into this marriage of their own free will.
The Vow Exchange
After the declaration of intent, the couple will make their vows to each other. Most officiants will use traditional vows. Depending on where you’re getting married, you may be allowed to write your own vows. Check with your officiant to find out.
The Ring Exchange
During the ring exchange, most officiants will read some words for each person to repeat as they put the ring onto their partner’s finger. The ring exchange is not a legal requirement, but many couples see it as an important symbol of their marriage.
Signing the Registry or the License
In some locations, you’ll sign a registry, or your license as part of the legal requirements for marriage. Sometimes your maid of honor and best man will also sign, as your witnesses. Some officiants will include the signing as part of your ceremony. Others will wait until afterwards to get all the signatures.
Unity Ceremony
Lots of couples like to include a unity ceremony, to symbolize their joining together as a couple. Some decide to include their parents, as a way to symbolize joining their two families together.
Depending on your house of worship, you may or may not be allowed to include a unity ceremony in your service. Many officiants will allow some types, like a candle lighting ceremony.
Pronouncement and the First Kiss
If you’ve included signing the registry, or a unity ceremony, everyone can return to their places at the altar once it’s complete. After everyone is in place, the officiant will make a few closing remarks. Then they will pronounce the couple officially married and announce the first kiss.
The Recessional
The happy couple will lead the way back down the aisle. The bridal party and officiant can follow in the same order that they entered.
The bride and groom, exchanging their vows.
Religious Wedding Ceremony Order
If you’re having your wedding in a place of worship, you’ll probably have a ceremony that’s already set. Your officiant will go over it with you, and make sure you understand all the steps. It may differ slightly in some churches or temples, but in general, most religious ceremonies will follow the same order.
Traditional Christian Wedding Ceremony
For most Christian denominations, a wedding ceremony must take place in a church. The order and the wording may already be set, depending on how strict the officiant is. Most Christian ceremonies include:
The family and bridal party processional.
The officiant opens the ceremony with a welcome and introduction.
Religious or spiritual readings.
The vow exchange.
Blessing of the rings.
The ring exchange.
The marriage pronouncement and first kiss.
The couple and bridal party recessional, followed by the officiant, the family and the guests.
Traditional Jewish Wedding Ceremony
A Jewish wedding ceremony takes place under a chuppah, or a canopy that symbolizes the home, love and familial support. The couple will have two rituals, just before starting the processional. Most Jewish wedding ceremonies will include:
Signing the ketubah, or the marriage contract.
The bedeken ritual, where the groom places the bride’s veil.
The processional.
The circling ritual.
The betrothal blessing.
The exchange of rings.
The Seven Blessings are recited.
The groom stomps on a glass in a cloth bag while the guests shout “mazel tov”.
The couple begins the recessional, followed by their family members, the bridal party and the officiant.
Traditional Hindu Wedding Ceremony
A Hindu wedding celebration traditionally has many events and takes place over a few days. The ceremony day begins with the groom and his family singing and dancing in procession. The details of the ceremony can vary, depending on family traditions. In general, most Hindu ceremonies will include:
The groom’s procession.
The bride’s family welcomes the groom.
The bride arrives and is escorted to the mandap.
Exchange of flower garlands.
The bride’s parents give her away.
A sacred fire is lit.
The couple circles the fire.
The couple performs the Seven Steps.
After the Seven Steps, the couple are officially married.
The couple will receive blessings, then leave the mandap.
This is only a short version of the ceremony.
A bride and groom, getting married at a traditional wedding venue.
Traditional Catholic Wedding Ceremony
When a couple plans a Catholic wedding ceremony, they have the option to choose a Celebration of Marriage or a Nuptial Mass. A Celebration of Marriage will end after exchanging the rings. If the couple chooses a Nuptial Mass, the service will include all the rituals of a regular mass, like Holy Communion and the Sign of Peace.
Entrance rites and processional.
Gloria and the opening prayers.
Liturgy of the word:
Readings
The gospel
Homily
The vow exchange.
Blessing the rings.
The ring exchange.
An optional coin exchange or lasso ceremony.
Offering the gifts and the Eucharist prayer.
Nuptial blessing.
The sign of peace.
Holy Communion.
Blessing the newlyweds.
The priest may invite the couple to share a first kiss.
Recessional.
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